Gordon Brown's abusive behaviour and volcanic eruptions of foul temper left Downing Street staff so frightened that he received an unprecedented reprimand from the head of the civil service, an explosive new book by the Observer's Andrew Rawnsley reveals today.
Sir Gus O'Donnell, the cabinet secretary, became so alarmed by the prime minister's behaviour that he launched his own investigations when he received reports of Brown's bullying of staff. O'Donnell then gave the prime minister a stern "pep talk" and ordered him to change his behaviour. "This is no way to get things done," he told Brown.
The revelation that the prime minister's behaviour was so extreme that it triggered a warning from Whitehall's most powerful official will shock the political world and is bound to lead to claims from his opponents that he is not fit for another five years in office as a general election draws near.
Rawnsley's book also reveals that after the debacle of the cancelled election in 2007 an increasingly unpopular Brown became more and more paranoid. When briefed that November about the loss of confidential data discs, containing the personal details of more than 20 million people, he leapt across the room and grabbed Gavin Kelly, his deputy chief of staff, by the lapels of his jacket. Brown snarled into Kelly's face: "They're out to get me!"
These incidents, and others, are revealed in the vivid and extraordinary account by Rawnsley of how Brown treated employees at all levels – from top aides to duty clerks and secretaries.
So, the man is a useless, abusive, corrupt, bullying shit. Tell us something that we didn't know.
Oh, wait! I didn't know that members of Brown's staff had called the National Bullying Helpline.
Several people in Gordon Brown's office have contacted an anti-bullying charity, its boss has told the BBC.
Christine Pratt said "three or four" calls had been made to the National Bullying Helpline in recent years.
And until I read Dizzy, I didn't know that Brown's abysmal treatment of his staff had also been asked about in Parliament and recorded in Hansard.
So... that's "three or four" calls, in the last "three or four" years, which is rather handily less than "five" which happens to be the number that Brown's own departments have confirmed have made complaints.
The thing is, I have been describing this screaming turd in highly unflattering terms for many years; now, I think, would be an opportune moment to remind newer readers of some of the classics.
- Gobblin' King Your Money (Feb 2006)
Gordo the Gobblin' King must die now, not later. Die, die, die, you incompetent piece of dried-out, white dogshit, like what you don't see around 'ere anymore, eeeeh. I wouldn't piss on you if you were on fire, unless I thought that, by peeing in strategic places, it might be possible for me to prolong your agony, you triple-cursed, knob-rotting, savings-fucking, wealth-destroying weeping sore on the hairy, sweaty scrotum of humanity.
Fuck you, Gobblin' King: fuck you right in the ear.
- The Gobblin' King Is Still A Power-Crazed Fuckwit (May 2006)
Many people who loathe Blair still think that The Gobblin' King is the saviour of the world, a financial wizard and architect of the greatest economic Golden Age that Britain has ever known. After I've viciously beaten these fuckers around the head—screaming "no, he's not! He is an incompetent cunt with one eye and a ludicrous oral twitch that makes me want to slice his lips off!"—I calm down slightly and, sitting serenely beside the deluded, bloody fool, I like to explain that their faith is misplaced.
Brown is a fuckwit of grand stature; he is a manipulative, lying, piece of crap who—notwithstanding his low profile when scandal breaks—is, nonetheless, a terrible cunt.
- The Gobblin' King: Pre-Budget Report (Nov 2006)
What do you want to bet that the fucker is angling for PM and Chancellor simultaneously? Anyway, you can bet that, if the devious cunt becomes PM, his Chancellor will be little more than a Brownite mouthpiece, the Gobblin' King's glyph burned onto the back of the greedy fucker's neck.
For fuck's sake, Brown, you fucking moron: when will you realise that just lobbing money at things does not make them any better? Have you learned nothing from the NHS? Huge amounts of money will be thrown at these schools, massive amounts will be skimmed off by LEAs and, once again, the vast majority of whatever remains will be flushed down the shitter.
- Gordon Brown: See The Cunt Suffer (May 2008)
I'd always hoped that maybe I would be the one to bring him down: instead, the Gobblin' King has utterly fucked up his career all by himself. I consider myself cheated, frankly.
Perhaps, just perhaps, I could be the one—to steal TNO's coma analogy—who delivers the swift kick to the throat that knocks out the ventilator tube and who leaps for joy as—in the grey, dank, dirty hospital room—the machine that has recorded the last moments of this great, fat, joyless tosser's life emits its final beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep before lapsing into a final, remorseless silence.
- Gordon Brown Has Lost His Tiny Fucking Mind (Nov 2008)
Gordon Brown: mad Mad McMad, the Mad Prime Madman of Madland. In short, the cunt is fucking barking.
This intellectual Titan does not, of course, have a fucking clue: the man is a dangerous fucking lunatic, and a cunt to boot. The Bobblin' King should be sectioned now, for the good of all of us: section the fucker before he does himself some harm—or, of course, before the British people wake up and save Gordon the trouble of harming himself...
According to the film tag, "the greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist": of course, the greatest trick that this one-eyed devil ever pulled was convincing anyone at all that he had the first fucking clue about economics.
Personally, I would love to be the person who writes the epitaph upon Gordon Brown's tombstone—preferably within the next few months. I could rant away, but I think that I would prefer someone pithy—something like this...
JAMES GORDON BROWN
"We will not see his like again—
The more that we see and hear about this fucking little shit, the more and more attractive the Tories appear.
Except, apparently, they don't (more on that later).