Well, the Tories haven't promised that, but they have, at least, taken a teeny tiny step in something approaching the right direction.
The Conservatives have announced a tax break plan for firms created in the first two years of a Tory government that they say would create 60,000 jobs.
Shadow chancellor George Osborne said an exemption on employers' National Insurance on their first 10 staff would be funded by savings to be announced.
Speaking at the Conservative Party conference in Manchester, Mr Osborne said the National Insurance measures would be "a huge boost to enterprise".
He added it would send the message: "Invest here, set up your business here, come and make your enterprise here and we will support you. We will send a message loud and clear that this country is open for business."
Aides said the exemption would apply to the first 10 employees hired by a business during its first year, up to an earning limit of £844 a week per employee, or about £44,000 a year.
For a new small business with 10 employees on an average salary of £25,000, Mr Osborne calculates this could save up to £25,000 a year.
Good. It looks like the Tories might be approaching this recession in the right way: don't fucking tax people so much and you will see higher growth and then higher tax receipts.
The bills are racking up," Chief Secretary to the Treasury Liam Byrne said. "George Osborne must tell us how he'll pay for them all."
Shut your fucking face, Byrne: you bunch of bastards have lost any credibility that you might once have had as far as managing the economy is concerned.
Work and Pensions Secretary Yvette Cooper said: "The Tories still want to make cuts in a recession that would destroy jobs and, according to respected economists, would actually push unemployment up to five million.
"They are simply rehashing Labour policies without the investment needed to make them work."
You don't actually know what policy you are commenting on, do you, Mrs Balls? Go fuck yourself or your husband, you useless cow. Both would be equally unpleasant.
Ignore the NuLabour nitwits: we want more of this sort of stuff, please, George.