First up, although our oh-so-benificent government have denied it time and again, via Timmy, it seems that there are plans afoot to ensure that everyone has to carry one.
State officials are to be given powers previously reserved for times of war to demand a person’s proof of identity at any time.
Anybody who refuses the Big Brother demand could face arrest and a possible prison sentence.
The new rules come in legislation to be unveiled in today’s Queen’s Speech.
They are presented as a crackdown on illegal immigration, but lawyers say they could be applied to anybody who has ever been outside the UK, even on holiday.
The civil rights group Liberty, which analysed clauses from the new Immigration and Citizenship Bill, called them an attempt to introduce compulsory ID cards by the back door.
By the "back door"? It seems to me that they have already decided that they cannot be bothered beating down your back door and have now come around to the front, rung the bell and then hoofed you in the knackers as you opened up.
Naturally, the government are denying that this is the case, and that...
"to maintain effective immigration control it is only right that we ask everyone attempting to enter the UK to produce a valid identity document."
Yes, but of course it is. Of course. So, tell me: you haven't been able to maintain effective control up until this point, right? And tell me again, oh Home Office wallah, how the fuck is this going to affect the vast majority of immigrants, who come in through the EU, anyway?
Meanwhile, Whipped Senseless has got hold of the Non-Disclosure Agreement for those working on the National Identity Scheme.
Other than the usual legal protection it gives the company, several areas of the agreement should cause serious concern.
Clause 3.2c states that companies working on the NIS should limit disclosure of information when required to do so by the courts.“Consult with the Authority as to possible steps to avoid or limit disclosure and take those steps where they would not result in significant adverse consequences to the Authority”
If that was not enough, Clause 5 of the document provides the grounds upon which the Home Office can secure access to the property, computers and records of the company, its employees and subcontractors. Such access would be at the “sole discretion” of the Home Secretary. No search warrant or judicial oversight would be required.
I do hope that you are all looking forward to our brave new world? I know that I am: I simply cannot wait to be thrown into jail because I have refused to show one of my state servants my ID Card.
What the fuck is going on in this country? Anyone? Bueller? Bueller...
And on that note, my impecunious Greek friend has some advice.
We've already, thanks to the staggering incompetence of the Speaker and the Serjeant-at-Arms, established that the police can barge into the Mother of Parliaments and ransack MPs' offices without a warrant. So I say, go the whole hog. Let's submit them to the same intrusive nannying they are happy for us to undergo.
Make them pay from their own pockets for ID cards that they can use to "quickly and conveniently establish their identity", fine them £1,000 if their details are incorrect, ban them from claiming the money back from the taxpayer, and then give the police the right to stop them and demand that identification at will.
Fingerprint them on entry to the Palace of Westminster, take DNA swabs from each and every one of them, and refuse to remove their details from the database, in breach of their human rights, when they are turfed out of office.
Demand receipts for every penny of expenditure that they claim back from the taxpayer - and fire and prosecute every single MP that steals public money to put their kids through university or keep their wives in shoes and handbags.
Fire and prosecute any MP who sexually harasses a colleague.
Ban all booze promotions in the Palace of Westminster; make MPs pay the same for their pints as the rest of us rather than enjoying taxpayer-subsidised cheap drink. And then, yes, breathalyse the cunts as they troop through the division lobbies to vote through yet more restrictions on matters which are absolutely none of their bloody business.
If these bastards are so determined to make our daily lives a misery, then the least we can do is to return the fucking favour.
Then, of course, we can hang them by the cock and the clit, and throw fireworks and cactuses at the fucks until they apologise. Then we will put them out of their misery...
... by hanging onto their legs and finally letting them die, die, die. The cunts.