The slippery slope argument, as any learned man will tell you, is a logical fallacy. Just because A leads to B, it does not necessarily mean that B will lead to C, let alone to D. And yet, when you're dealing with puritanical health groups and authoritarian politicians, you can be pretty sure that A will lead to D, E, F and fucking Z before you can say "thin end of the wedge".
When people used to say that the increasingly vicious pogram against smokers would lead to a similar war of attrition against drinkers and fatties, they were told to stop being so fucking stupid. Apples and oranges, you see. And yet, barely a year after the smoking ban, we have this shit:
Cigarette-style health warnings will have to be displayed wherever alcoholic drinks are sold. This would include shops, bars and, according to the industry, could force restaurants to place an official “sensible drinking message” on every table.
And so the uglification of Britain continues apace.
The practice of selling cocktails called Sex on the Beach, or more sexually graphic names, will also be scrapped.
These people are not puritans. Repeat, not puritans. Now go back to sleep.
A ban on drinking games, such as downing a glass in one.
Good luck policing that one. And best of all...
There will also be rules to limit “happy hour” offers that encourage speed drinking.
Now, these are all just "proposals" for the time being but does anyone seriously believe that all of this and more won't happen? If that miserable, lemon-sucking, Presbyterain bastard in Downing Street was ever destined to go down in history for anything, it was surely to be remembered as the man who banned happy hour. Not since Oliver Cromwell banned Christmas has a law complemented a man's odious personality so perfectly. It is almost as if the cunt's whole life has been leading up to this moment.
Let's get some facts out of the way:
In terms of the European league of per capita alcohol consumption, Britain is firmly in mid-table, at 13th.
Alcohol consumption has been falling every year since the 24 hour drinking law came into effect and there are 36 pubs closing every week (largely thanks to that terrifically popular smoking ban).
The graph below is from the Office of National Statistics and shows how many men and women are exceeding the government's "sensible drinking" limits (which are based on no evidence).
A mounting wave of alcoholism or just another load of old bollocks? You decide.
Or rather, let's not decide. Instead, let's ignore the facts like the British idiots we are and pretend we're in the grip of a drinking epidemic. And then let's propose some retarded policies which our fun-loving Prime Minister and hateful butt-weevils like Dawn fucking Primarolo will jump at the chance of implementing.
'So what?' you may say. The measures outlined above are only going to inconvenience what's left of the pub industry. It's not going to affect how much you drink. Indeed it won't, and for that very reason you can be sure that harsher laws will soon follow. Because this is not about education, or even about moderation. It is about making drink - and, by association, drinkers - socially unacceptable. If these laws don't reduce overall consumption (and they won't) then "tougher" action will be required to "encourage" us to drink less.
As of this month, photos of diseased organs will be placed on every cigarette packet to "encourage" smokers to quit. By the bent logic of the health zealots, there is no reason why the same sort of images shouldn't be slapped on wine bottles. And if you think I'm indulging in the old slippery slope fallacy, I should tell you that it's already been suggested by the British Medical Association (and by their counterparts in Australia.)
Balls to logical fallacies. Don't give these bastards an inch.