Monday, September 08, 2008

More jumped up Council cunts

The really awful thing about humanity is that the kind of people who should never, ever have any power over anyone, at all, always seem to be the ones who get it. Those who seek power should, in fact, never be given it.

But, I must admit that I have a little more respect for those with grand designs—at least they are thinking big. People like this, however, are just fucking little shits who should be ceremonially hanged in this self-same park for the sport of crows.
A few weeks ago, a well-known local protester was evicted from the park for dressing up as a penguin and handing out climate change propaganda. Now, this is someone I’ve locked horns with on more than one occasion and of course I don’t agree with her views on climate change (she believes in anthropogenic climate change, I have common sense) but on this we agreed—she has every right to stand in a public place and hand out leaflets as long as she doesn’t harass anyone. The council officers who evicted her from that public place had no right to do so and several people told them so. They even told her that you are only allowed to hand out leaflets in the park if you have had a Police CRB check and signed a declaration agreeing to all sorts of restrictions. This is, of course, a load of bollocks - they cannot impose these conditions on anyone wanting to use a public place.

But they don’t let the little matter of acting without authority get in the way. No, rather than apologise for harassing someone going about their lawful business they have announced that anyone seen in the park without a child will be challenged by their agents who will want to know who they are and why they are in the park without a child.

Well, bugger me: I hadn't realised that parks were only for the entertainment of children—had you? I had this weird idea that parks might actually be for the benefit of everyone, that green spaces were considered a "public good".

How stupid I've been: you see, I thought "public" meant everyone, not just children and their parents. What a dimbo I am.
I’m a father of four and I want my children to be safe. What I don’t want is the type of society where everyone is assumed to be guilty.

The council’s pronouncement has gone down like a lead balloon locally and a protest has been organised for Saturday morning by Telford Council Watch. I’ll be there sans enfants to show the facists at Telford & Wrekin Council what I think of their new rules and to exercise my right, as per the legally binding contract that transferred ownership of the park to the Telford Development Corporation (now susbumed into the council), to free and open access to the park.

So fuck you, Telford Council, and your fucking insulting suspicions and your totalitarian behaviour. I hope that the good people of Telford line up and fuck every orifice in your skulls until you are starting to suffocate, your eye jelly dribbling down your neck whilst all that you can hear is the sound of cum whooshing in your ears.

Or they could just vote you out, I suppose...


Old Holborn said...

A PSCSO knocked on my door this morning investigating "a disturbance" that happened at 01:30 on the 16th August outside my gaff.

I laughed and told him to get off my property.

He was not amused. I was

Obnoxio The Clown said...

Councils: they're all fucking mad.

Anonymous said...

Anyone in a park without a child must be a child-hunter. I've experienced this already since I cross a playground on the way home every evening. I cross it in the morning too but it's empty then.

The stares I get from mothers tell quite a tale. Their reaction when one of the kids said 'hello' and I had the temerity to say 'hello' back was astounding. I swear that kid's feet never touched the ground.

He'll know better than to say 'hello' to me in future. That'll teach him to be nice to people. He won't do it again.

I've taken to drooling and grinning and muttering to myself whenever I pass there now. Keeps the kids away and gives the mothers something to talk about.

'He comes through here every evening you know. Disgusting. We should tell the council to make him take the long way round. Can't have people like that around children.'

The camps await.

Wrinkled Weasel said...

A direct ancestor of mine was executed as a witch in Salem, Mass., in the late 17th century. That this was able to happen was because of a combination of social, political and economic factors, all very local and quite unlike those of 21st century Britain.

And yet, we are still looking for scapegoats. Most women (and men) convicted of witchcraft were poor, ugly and old. Most people have a similar, stereotypical view of what a pedophile should look like; check out the loner, check out the guy in pebble glasses with his top button done up, clutching a shoulder bag under his armpit, etc,etc.

Suddenly though, this has gone one further. We are now in the world of compulsory contextualisation into macro cultures. That is, you must be rigorously and preferably, officially in context in any given public situation.

Merely not having kids if you are in a public park, puts you out of context. Taking photographs in London is ok if you are Japanese or American, but what if you are British and you decide to film the headquarters of the Metropolitan Police? If you are not black, what are you doing in Electric Avenue? If you ARE black, what are you doing in Beauchamp Place? You have to wear the right clothes. You can run, only if you sport lycra, an ipod and trainers. If you run down the street wearing a hoodie you might be tackled..though I doubt it. If you wear a Barbour Jacket you are an upper class cunt. If you wear a hoodie you are scum and cannot be let into the Mall.

It is all about context.

What it means is that our society is more ghettoised, more insular, and more unable to be comfortable with non PLUs than ever.

Anonymous said...

Is it true that you can’t consume alcohol in parks anymore either? That puts a dampener on any sort of summer picnic (not that its very warm anymore). I remember now, it was done to force people to buy drinks from highly taxed pubs rather than from supermarkets. ‘was forgetting im from the future.

wonkotsane said...

Vote them out? They've only just been voted in!

A lot of people have said they're going to be there on Saturday morning. Time we took back our park.

Anonymous said...

Vote them out? (2). From experience the jobs-for-life managers & "executive officers" are the corrupt arseholes that really make the decisions. The Councillors are just a bit of window dressing.

Anonymous said...

@ manfromthefuture

When I was in Victoria Tower Gardens (on Millbank just west of Parliament) last week there were numerous groups having picnic lunches, with wine. There was the expected high police and officious busybody presence - who seemed completely unconcerned.

Having said that, there are many areas (such as my local town) where you are banned from drinking in the town centre area. That particular one, IIRC, doesn't involve any park space but some may.

Old Holborn said...

Turn up at EVERY council meeting just wearing a thong or waving a pitchfork.

Anonymous said...

And it is not just in parks

I support these peoples freedom to bore even if it is not reciprocated

Dr Evil said...

Councils eh? is qualified to use wellingtons to remove the bin from 4" of water and they need a safety harness incase they get carried away by the current.

Telfor? Why don't they tackle the Telford taliban first of all?

Dave said...

Anon wrote-
"From experience the jobs-for-life managers & "executive officers" are the corrupt arseholes that really make the decisions. The Councillors are just a bit of window dressing."

Agreed. If they decide to build a house, the councillors are allowed choose the curtains and the colour of the front door.

It's a sad fact that the people who make the decisions don't have to live with the consequences. Everyone else acts out of fear.

Anonymous said...

"challenged by their agents who will want to know who they are and why they are in the park without a child"

What law covers that then?

The reply would be either "get fucked", or more daringly "Oh, the usual" accompanied by an exaggerated wink.

wonkotsane said...

It was the Tipton Taliban, I don't think we've had any terrorists in Telford ... yet. Mind you, if they ever raided Urban Gardens or Regent Street that might change.

Anyway, things have moved on a bit.

Anonymous said...

If you're annoyed by this story and have a bit of time on your hands, why not tell Telford Council?

Let them know what a bunch of cunts they are.

Anonymous said...

Have just read on the Shropshire Star website that the elected council leader has apologised for the facist policy of the unelected worthless shitbags who imposed the policy.

TheFatBigot said...

Perhaps things will change if ever a shiny-suited jobsworth gets the push for issuing this sort of moronic diktat. It is gross misconduct justifying (indeed, requiring) summary dismissal.

Anonymous said...

Being a property developer, I've loads of time on my hands right now. I used to deal with these sanctimonious, incompetent, felchers every day of my life.

Once they are at their desks I suppose they have to do something, so this sort of idiocy is what we get. Local Government consists of thousands of throw-back class-warriors and lilly-livered, cordouroy-wearing liberal incompetents led by a bunch of bitter, senile, pensioners looking for an excuse to leave the house and the odd twenty-two year old 'Blair Babe' with an eye on joining the Commons gravy-train.

Meeting them on a daily basis, it's hard to imagine how most of them manage to dress themselves, let alone find their way to work, however 'flexy' their time might be. What they do when they get there is beyond me. My brother is a Uni lecturer and he reckons he spends half his day in meetings with publicly-funded bearocrats discussing whether they have an ethnically balanced, environmentally sustainable pencil-purchasing-policy. Wankers the lot of 'em.

Of course, Hitler wrote Mein Kamph in clink so perhaps boredom and personal failure creates fascism by default?

Anonymous said...

Frankly, the primary danger in a Telford park at night is from fucking children!

Anonymous said...

What's odd here is women are usually exempt from the sort of feminist thinking that adults without visible children are a danger to children.

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