But just hours after going on sale in the UK, the new Apple iPhone was met with disappointment by buyers struggling to get to grips with its shortcomings and its hefty £900 cost.
Anyone who buys an iPhone has to pay £269 for the handset and sign up for an 18-month contract with the O2 mobile phone network at £35 a month, making a total of £899.
I'm sorry, but did I miss some kind of fucking meeting? Am I being diddled? Is every other mobile phone contract free these days?
Fucking hell, I feel like a total chump, because I have been on a monthly mobile phone contract for over ten years and—I'm embarrassed to admit this—I have been paying a monthly fucking fee! I feel like a total fucking idiot because I hadn't realised that everybody else was getting their calls, texts and handsets for absolutely bugger all.
Or is it that the rest of you are wandering around with magic handsets that don't actually require a network at all?
Because, unless that is the case, the iPhone does not cost £900, although you can say that the iPhone and the required O2 contract does cost you that. However, as I have pointed out before, almost all mobile operators insist that you take out a minimum contract of 12 months so I fail to see the fucking problem.
I have an O2 contract, and my usual monthly spend (including data transfer, which is unlimited under the iPhone contracts) is around £40: does that mean that my Nokia N73 (which came "free" with my contract) costs £720 over 18 months?
No, of course it fucking doesn't.
The iPhone does have shortcomings and £269 is a fair amount to pay for a handset but this £900 trope is absolute fucking tripe.
DISCLAIMER: I own Apple shares. And they've taken a bit of a dive over the last week, so I would appreciate the fucking Daily Mail not spreading more fucking stupid, share-price-damaging lies, the cunts.