Friday, June 08, 2007

Bloody Devil #16

Bloody Devil AwardThe Bloody Devil Award is for people who fisk objects of public derision but who also pepper the post with gratuitous but intensely satisfying insults.

This, whilst theoretically possible (since they are awarded on a post by post basis), is an unprecedented event; but the volume of emails is almost overwhelming: Mr Eugenides, winner of the inaugural Bloody Devil in December 2005, wins another for this quite brilliant roundup of the ills and evils emanating from our politicians, particularly those in Brussels.
The only type of pleasure which is not to be curtailed or officially discouraged, it seems, is the quiet, desperate satisfaction these thin-lipped simpletons get from drafting and passing unnecessary legislation; poring over piles of documents late into the night (tightly-typed and printed double-sided on recycled paper, natch) by the flickering, sepulchral light of Fairtrade candles (to save on emissions), trying to come up with exciting new ways of strangling the joy out of life, their spare hand shuttling remorselessly yet fruitlessly back and forth inside their trousers. Fuck them. Fuck you, Chris Davies, fuck you, Caroline Flint, and fuck you all - jointly, severally, repeatedly, relentlessly, painfully, humiliatingly, and in seven holes till sundown. Fuck you bareback in the arse and fuck you in the eyesockets. Fuck off.

Go and read the whole post: it is a thing of almost divine beauty.


Anonymous said...

Well done and well earned feta chomper :-)

Anonymous said...

Many thanks for the completely unbelievable round-about link to the Scottish Parliament's research paper on Adult Entertainment.

I particularly enjoyed/had an attack of the vapours at the key findings in s.3 which uses 'punctuation' in its analysis.

"One anonymous performer commented that stag parties' contribution to the weekend economy should not be underestimated and formed the major part of any lap dance establishment's weekend custom. Lap dance clubs form part of a 'ritual' observed by many stag parties. Usually this involves some form of ritual humiliation of the groom-to-be by lap performers. The object of their visit to the clubs is 'for a laugh' and to provide entertainment that is illicit, but due to the 'look don't touch' policy does not carry much (if any) moral dilemma. She thought, however, that the public in general suffers from a large degree of misinformation relating to the sex industry and that a lack of objective research on most areas of the industry rendered it open to manipulation through the media."

Since many lap dancers do indeed have sociology degrees, I think she might really have said that.

The research included culture vultures too:

"The Scottish Arts Council representatives were keen to express the view that art is about representation of an act and about being able to highlight all types of representations of society to allow people to think, reflect and challenge thoughts. They were concerned that regulation of the adult entertainment industry might, unwittingly, restrict artistic freedom."

There, told you, it's art if it is on a plinth.

Do not miss the little nuggets, such as the 'anti' campaign which was so incompetent that they used their own names over and over again, so that even the puritan working party had to discount their contribution.

Do not miss the Venue Visits section which contains too many goodies to quote. Sample:

"The unannounced visits allowed us to see what the ordinary man and woman would experience (though we were aware that middle aged women are probably not normal customers). Performers thought we were on an office outing..."

Well, they were. And they went everywhere in the name of research, all on the taxpayers' money.

Adult Entertainment Working Group (AEWG) report and recommendations to Ministers on the adult entertainment industry in Scotland.
April 25 2006

Jackart said...

Mr Eugenides BD & Bar

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