Sunday, April 29, 2007

Admin at The Kitchen

Just to let you all know, I shall be doing a bit of a revamp of the blog over the next couple of weeks. The three-column template was originally implemented to allow me to put Adsense in the "sweet spot" but, since they will no longer serve to me and the others bring in nothing significant, they may as well be excised.

All round, I shall be going for a sleeker and, hopefully, more swiftly loading template (this one has become very bloated). I shall also be trimming my blogrolls. If anyone else has any suggestions for what they'd like to see on here, please let me know, Anonoymously if you want, in the Blogger Comments (the Haloscan ones will be leaving. Finally).

UPDATE: could I also get your views on the level of swearing? Is it amusing? Is it tiresome and off-putting? I ask because, when I started this blog, I was seriously angry: hence the swearing. I have calmed down a bit—or, rather, I've become more grimly focused—over the last few years (although certain things still piss me off); indeed, you may have realised that the amount of Anglo-Saxon has dropped. Views on this?

Should I try not to swear at all, or just simply go with what feels right for any one piece? (I will probably go with that last anyway, as I always have; still, it's good to get some views).


Tom Tyler said...

Your blog is one of those blogs which I mentally file under "blogs which never finish loading" - I ALWAYS have to hit "Stop" as soon as the main text appears, or else I could leave it for minutes on end and the page would still be loading something or other. 'Twill be nice to see this rectified!

Tom Tyler said...

Just read your update re swearing.
It's amusing and reflects what most ordinary people feel about the shower of shits who rule us. If you were a non-political party member, it wouldn't be a problem. However, as I've said before, as you're a UKIP member and a growing influence in the political blogosphere, it can and will be used against you by the mainstream media, especially as election time draws near.
I think you'll be faced with a choice here in the next few years: Either continue as a swearblogger and let it be known that you are in no way officially aligned with or a member of UKIP, or else if you continue as a party member, then if they have any sense, you're going to be told in no uncertain terms to quit the swearblogging.
It's sad and stupid, but no politician or political party that wants to capture votes can afford to be linked, no matter how tenuously, with a party member who liberally bandies around "effs" and "c"'s on their blog. It's a political decision. If you're on good terms with Iain Dale, you should ask him what he thinks about this; he knows his way round the block.

sjk said...

your what you wanna.
if a subject makes you feel like swearing,then swear.

the Tom Tyler comment makes sense,but then most folk think most polticians are lyong sacks of shite anyway.

Blair/Cameron are more offensive when they try to come across as salt of the earh every day guys.

Chris - Tooting Bec said...

The only reason I gained an interest in reading political blogs was due to stumbling across yours (searching for the term “Gordon Brown C**t” on google). Not only did your level of swearing reflect what I was feeling it was appropriately used and enhanced the blog. To be honest I spent nearly the whole day going through all your archived blogs and found it informative and entertaining and have been coming back ever since.

Unfortunately as Tom Tyler has already pointed out – to the main stream your swearing would only be used to discredit you. At the end of the day as a politician you may be able to help remove the deluded cock dribbling scrotes in parliament now!!!

I thought there was no hope for politics until I found the devils kitchen.

Bill said...

Whilst I do not permit swearing/profanity of any kind in my own blog, the fact that you have a different policy in your blog has never stopped me visiting - it's what you write that matters, not precisely how you word it. I disagree strongly with a lot of what you write, but whatewer else one may say about you style of writing it usually contains insights and unexpected angles.

The comments about your seeming increasing influence as a political blogger, closely aligned with one particular party, is obviously a conisideration - has no-one in UKIP already expressed a view to you already? I'd imagine in the longer term, if a more public role is what you aspire to, that the swear-blogging will become a liability.

The main 'criticism' I would have of your style of writing is its (often) inordinate length. Even a leisured individual such as me must set some limits on the time I can afford to wade through pages and pages of text, often with what are simply very lengthy quotations from other blogs or news media to 'pad' it out.

Paul said...

You should keep the swearing, it is what makes your blog one of my daily "must reads"

John said...

My problem with the language is that it frequently stops me forwarding your pieces to some who I know would benefit but be most upset at the f'ing and baring. I think most know the f word. The c word still seems to hold horrors. I also think there is a bit too much of it and any addition for effect is diluted amongst the never ending stream. Just my 2P worth.

LFB_UK *The Legend* said...

I have seen on other blogs, and I dont know how they do it, but to read a certain piece you have to click on a more link... could you not do this so that the sweary bits were hidden?

I personally believe your anger is ok and the language does not bother me in the slightest.

As Chris - Tooting bec said, I found your site and you led me to others. Tone the language down if you must, but please dont stop!

Longrider said...

The point about a political decision is well made, I think. Sometimes I will write a sweary piece and then tone it down on reflection. Other times, I'll leave the swearing in because it puts across just how angry I feel. I could, however, leave the profanities out completely and still find plenty of rich language to express myself. You could, too.

Ultimately, though, it's your decision.

Anonymous said...

It would be disappointing if you felt you had to cut out the swearing. It can be a bit of a shock but I have never seen such creative use of offensive language. In fact it has on several occasions caused me to laugh out load. I take on board what Tom Tyler says, but if you cut out the swearing it wont be half as amusing. Though to be fair you have a talent with writing and I expect you could easily get your point across without the level of invective. Still for me it's waht brings me back to your blog so please don't quit on my account!

Tom Paine said...

I don't think your swearing makes the posts interesting. I think you swear when you are passionate enough to write something interesting.

By this logic, if you are not excited enough to swear, it's probably best you don't post at all.

Anonymous said...

DK, go to any pub, any club, anywhere where there is a group of people, or even where people might meet from a couple to dozens, and you'll hear lots and lots of swearing. Yes, even from ladies and youngsters.

The sanctimonious twats who moan and whine about swearing are in a tiny minority, so you must choose between serving the masses or the fucking branless few.

The vast majority of people find it amusing and also refreshing.

Do you have a blog; a virtual meeting place and conversation? Or a piece of literary work?

Fuck them and keep up the good work.

Jan Tregeagle said...

Keep on swearing, it amusesand is a valuable guide in the art of offense.

Soupdragon said...

Re: swearing ~ don't be a Sam, be a Gene Genie and proud of it!
Re: new design ~ summat as loads a bit quicker would be nice. But it's not a ball-breaker - do what you want, obviously.

Still love this page!


Alan Douglas said...

DK, I have a split view on swearing. On the one hand I almost never use the c-word, and do not like to see it used, on the other, where you and mainly Guido do use it, in relation to certain people I loathe, it has seemed entirely appropriate, and indeed somewhat cathartic.

However, I also agree with Tom that it does limit your further progress in being of influence, and I think that a shame. Another pointed out that he cannot forward your messages because of the swear words.

I think you should announce a change of policy, you write well enough, and ther are in fact quite a few words in English that would suit without causeing anyone any offence, thus your impact would be hugely increased.

For what it is worth, consider my comments filtered through my political allegiances - I vote Conservative, but UKIP when that means their influence increases through proportional rep.

Either way, we NEED your viewpoints to continue, and whatever you decide, I will be a avid reader.

Alan Douglas

PS The letters I now need to type in the box are vafywbbk - so akin to wtf I had to laugh

Mr Eugenides said...

As you know I am frequently a user of strong language - but, like you, the level of swearing has diminished over the past year or so.

I think it has to depend on the post and the context - it would be a terrible shame if you found yourself self-censoring for political reasons or to preserve the sensibilities of the supposed audience.

For my own part I try to vary things and not simply swear in post after post; it becomes a bit boring. But let's face it; sweary language is your USP! The Devil's Kitchen without 'cunt' would be like Hamlet without the Prince...

Roger Thornhill said...

Your swearing scans very well indeed. The cadence and build up gets me to laugh out loud on a regular basis. Your swearing has good timing. The Ted Heath article was a good one. How better to pour scorn on that traitor?

As others have said, tho', 'tis your blog, but it might be worth considering the level of invective for pieces where you are considering policy or strategy, so these can be safely forwarded.

Devil's Kitchen said...

Thanks for all of your feedback, critcisms and compliments; much appreciated. I suspect that I shall carry on swearing when I need to but tone it down elsewhere.

Although I don't swear for the sake of it, I do tend to swear casually (as I often do in speech) and it is this should be excised, I think.

Politically, well, we shall have to see. I have always thought that some of the more violent imagery is the thing that any news organisations might go for, rather than swearing per se.

We shall see how it all goes. In all circumstances, thanks for continuing to read The Kitchen, and your continuing comments. They are all taken on baord, even if I don't answer them.


Anonymous said...

Swearing is fine, but I'd still read the blog with or without.

The template is a mess, good riddance to it. It does not work right for me in IE, the right column is always shifted to below the middle column, as if it is to wide.

I read your blog every day if I can, so please keep it up.


Anonymous said...

Although I don't swear for the sake of it, I do tend to swear casually (as I often do in speech) and it is this should be excised, I think.


You're a blogger, not a party slave like Dale.

Keep the blog conversational with commentary, not commentary made to look conversational.

Unless of coure you are planning on being a true hack?

Devil's Kitchen said...

Oh, good god, no. I prefer my notoriety amongst those in the know!

No, it's really being because even I get tired of seeing the "f" word occasionally!

Anyway, the template needs to be sorted out before I address any issues of style.


Jim Bliss said...

I've not read all of the comments on this thread, so apologies if I'm repeating anything that's already been said.

The template is quite bloated, and something on it seems to take forever to load. The design (colours, typeface, etc.) isn't a problem in my view. But having recently downsized to a two-column layout myself, it seems to have been well-received by my readers.

As for the swearing thing... it's interesting isn't it? I do a fair amount of swearing on my blog (nothing like DK-levels, mind) but over the years I've discovered that context is very important. There are occasions when the word 'fuck' seriously detracts from any point you're trying to make, and there are occasions when it gets readers vehemently nodding in agreement. The problem is working out which is which (sometimes easy enough; sometimes an impossible task; and sometimes you -- like me -- get it wrong).

Politically speaking, we inhabit very different parts of the spectrum, but I still enjoy your blog, and I don't think you need to make any radical changes to how you write.

Devil's Kitchen said...

The colours were designed to try to ensure readability, so it is likely that they won't change significantly.

However, most of the bloatware will be removed.


Bag said...

DK, A few well chosen swear words makes it a DK post. You know my views on swearing and your political ambitions. I think certain words are a definite -ve for the mainstream reader who will be shown your site. But it's too late now. It's up to you but less use of certain words would be beneficial. Bill Hicks was excellent but many could not see past the swearing and some of his imagery. Sad but a fact of life.

As far as the site goes. About time. I always click on it then travel to another blog while it loads and then, as an IE user, have to scroll down, and down, and....., you get the picture.

Anonymous said...

You probably can't swear if you have political ambitions. Sorry, that's one of the costs of entry as the voters just don't like it, even if they do it. Hypocrites and fools, the lot of us. But if you are doing the blog, use profanity with light a touch for emphasis, otherwise it is just like those cartoons done in black one-thickness lines. Bluntess only works if it has subtlety to contrast against. Too much and I can't see through the blizzard to understand what you are angry about.

The Remittance Man said...

As an accreditted Swearblogger I say go with the flow. It's your blog, your thoughts and your words. If anybody complains - fukem!

Given your readership numbers I'd also say you must be doing something right.

james higham said...

I shall also be trimming my blogrolls.


Re the swearing - I tend to navigate past it to the substance although it definitely has its place as a shock tactic.

The Remittance Man said...

By the way. What's this about the mainstream using DK's naughty language as a reason to disregard him?

Do they disregard Saint Bob "Get yer feckin money out" Geldoff? Or any other foul mouthed leftie for that matter? Of course not.

It's just a pathetic excuse to ignore a view from outside their own little paradigm.

Mary said...

I agree with John's comment up there. Sure, a full-on sweary rant is good for the soul in a lot of ways, but if you have the brains and vocabulary and you do it without expletives, then it's a lot harder for the fuckwits* who should be paying attention to simply dismiss your argument as profanity-ridden garbage.

I've answered your query over at my place, btw.

*excuse me...

Anonymous said...

Dk , I enjoy my daily trip to your blog ,Ive got no problem with your swearing ,but rememeber if your going to do politics as with Ukip, then please beware some ba--ard will use it against you ,and it will return to bite your bum ,it must be a hard thing to decide, your choice.

Surreptitious Evil said...

Tom said it better than I could. We read your blog because you post interesting but, especially, thought provoking stuff.

With the current bunch of egregious numpties, thinking about them is likely to involve profanity. Keep at it mate - post what you want and when.

But then I amn't looking for a political whatever in UKIP ...


Steve_Roberts said...

Re swearing; The reason your blog is interesting is your insight and wit: you are better when you swear less, because you have more pertinnent points. Don't cut it out, but do bearin mind it's not the objetc of the exercise

BTW, WTF is this 'blogger comments' vs 'comments' business ?

DocBud said...

Swearing is about timing. If you use it sparingly it can add emphasis and wit. The classic piece of timing is the Life of Brian, "How shall we f&%k off, O'Lord?" and next the cheese shop sketch (which people can watch here:

Incidently, I'm known as someone who doesn't swear which helped when a woman I'd had a minor traffic altercation with accused me of swearing at her and sent the plod around. I said I could produce a hundred character witnesses who would swear that I wouldn't swear in front of a lady (or non-lady of the female persuasion) let alone at one. I'm not offended by swearing I just choose not to swear myself. On the very rare occasions a swear word has slipped out, people know I must be really upset.

Machiavelli's Understudy said...

Keep the swearing! It's got a certain... 'truthiness' to it.

Hoddy said...

The swearing is sometimes amusing but there is often too fucking much irrelevant and fucking pointless swearing.



PS: take a leaf from Viz's book and invent a swearword. Tony Bliar is a total fitbin.

Pogo said...

To me it seems that you hit harder when you don't swear... But you're a lot funnier when you do!

RadioActive Chief said...

I find I can usually generate adequate levels of invective without the extreme Anglo-Saxonisms, although there ARE times when it's just absolutely required. In that case....

Anyway, going by what one REALLY is thinking at the time of writing is generally going to be best, and more effective than plugging into a pre-determined "schtick" of either extreme profanity or total avoidance of same, unless THAT's your natural style.

In other your OWN thing...which it looks to me like you pretty much do anyway!

Guido Faux said...


You're the devil aren't you? - Jesus I saw you on Doughty St and you even look like the devil.

Swearing - It's good but must be used sparingly to be effective.

Haloscan - The devil's spawn.

MJS said...

On the swearing, I have pointed out before that when you care passionately about something, the swearing stops - and the resultant prose, for me at least, is that much more convincing. (But I have to say I don't find swearing funny, in general. It needs to be clever as well.)

Oh yeah? So what has happened for the last ten years, exactly?

Over at the ASI, they are posting some of the winning entries of the Young Writers on Liberty. One does not want to put such keen minds off,...