But what about this marketplace? Do you use... well... your card to buy songs using, well, money? No! The people at Microsoft have, instead, decided to lose their tiny little minds!
Zune users must buy and download music from a dedicated Zune music store—or rip their own CDs and copy them on to the player.
Zune owners can buy individual tracks using a points system—79 Zune points equals 99 cents which buys a single—or subscribe to the service monthly, giving users access to two million tracks.
What the fuck? 79 Zune points equals 99 cents which equals a single? What the hell were they thinking? Were they thinking that, because iTunes Store songs cost 99 cents in the States but 79p in Britain that this was somehow going to convince people on both sides of the Atlantic that they are getting value for money? What the... I mean, what spanner came up with that system?
Mr Mossberg also criticised the payment scheme for the Zune marketplace, pointing out that users have to buy £5-worth of points at a time, even if they intend to buy only a single track.
And again, what? So, I can go onto the iTunes Store and spend 79p—and 79p only (and, yes, I do that quite often, especially in my impecunious state)—or I can go onto the Zune marketplace and buy £5 (or is it dollars, Beeboids?) worth minimum? So, wait, hang on? How many points to a pound?
No, wait hang on, let's assume that they mean 5 dollars so that would be... er... five lots of 99 cents (which actually equal 79 points) but with four cents left over so I actually have 395 p[oints but I've still got 4 cents left over so when I've spent 123 dollars and 73 cents then I will be able to get an extra song. I think. But if it's actually pounds, then there are about... er... how many dollars to the pound? Er, so where was I...
You see? Microsoft have lost their tiny, weasel-like minds...