My pay has gone up approximately 25% over the last two years. That extra money has been earned by hitting government targets. The targets were set by the government, not by us, and mostly have little to do with health care, but a lot to do with “process” and bogus but quantifiable “healthcare achievements”.
We told the government at the outset that it was a waste of money, that the money could be better spent but, to them, “control” was everything.
They removed our professional autonomy. They told us what to do, and promised us piece-rate financial rewards for doing it. So we have done it, and done it more efficiently than they thought possible.
This was always a lose-lose PR exercise for doctors. If we had not hit the targets, we would have been lazy. If we hit them, we are greedy.
Well, up to a point, Lord Copper. I don't know how GP practices are run, but whether they are run on a company or partnership basis, the GPs could elect to pay themselves less. But, then, why should they do that?
The government is effectively complaining that the money should not go to GPs' salaries but, as Health Minister Lord Warner puts it, to "further improvements in services for patients, such as longer opening hours or widening the range of services." The trouble is that, if you have longer opening hours, then you would rather expect the doctors to pay themselves more for those extra hours, wouldn't you? After all, that's how it generally works in business: you work longer hours, you get paid more.
Lord Warner, as Wat Tyler points out, is the kind of lame-arse fuckwit who has never actually worked in the private sector.
Who is Lord Norman Warner? He's someone who has spent his entire career moving between the "public and voluntary sectors – as a civil servant, local authority executive, political adviser and quangocrat" (see this profile). "High spots" include a spell as Red Babs Castle's Principal Private Secretary in the 70s. He would not be my choice of shopper.
Quite. And what is it that Lord Warner was actually shopping for?
He said: "We invested extra funding in GP services in good faith both to improve services and reward GPs. The money was not intended just to boost GPs' profits.
"We expect a higher level of these profits to be invested back into their businesses, to bring about further improvements in services for patients, such as longer opening hours or widening the range of services.
"We want to see this year and next a higher proportion of practice income going on service improvement for patients, and greater efficiency rather than windfall profits."
Well, my Lord Warner, might I suggest that if that is what you wanted that you actually write it into the fucking contracts, you stupid cunt? Have you absolutely no idea how business works?
No, no, of course you haven't. And, of course, you seem to think that doctors should be above all that grubby money, don't you? That they should altruistically work for as little as possible and even throw their own money back into patient care.
Tell me, Lord Warner, how much are you paid for utterly cocking up the GP contracts and pissing away millions—or, more likely, billions—of pounds of taxpayers' money? Will you be giving some of it back because you have completely fucked it up?
We have to make these bastards personally, financially liable for fuck ups: it is the only way that we will ever get a half-decent level of value-for-money from these idiot, arsehole government nutjobs.
In the meantime, Lord Warner, could I respectfully ask you to fuck off?