Tuesday, June 13, 2006

What's the Kos of this stupidity?

Once again, His Imperial Majesty forces my attention away from the idiocy of our own dear leaders, and draws my gaze to our colony over the pond; for over at the Daily Kos, a father and his young daughter are sharing a moment. No, not like that; don't be disgusting.
I don't think I've ever seen such a look of misery and dejection on the face of my daughter as I just did a moment ago. She just couldn't understand why the President would be going to Iraq when so many things are wrong in this country.

I know that many of our American cousins would say that Mr Bush is what's wrong with the country and would be more than happy to see him leave. But still, you can't have logic from loonies...
"Doesn’t Mr. Bush care about us anymore?" she asked pitifully.

"Us"? Do you mean "me"? Jesus, what a whiney little runt.
I sat down with her on the sofa and (as calmly as I could) tried to explain to her why the President seems to be abandoning his country. "Honey, I think his boss, Mr. Rove, sent Mr. Bush out of the country in order to keep himself out of the newspapers. You see, he wasn’t sure if he was going to be arrested today or not, and so he planned Mr. Bush’s trip ahead of time just in case...”

Who was going to be arrested? Bush, or Rove? 'Cos, if it's the latter, looks like he's off the hook. And if it is the former, then what for? Or is this wishful Moonbat thinking?
I tried to keep my voice steady, but it became increasingly difficult - the rage and feelings of helplessness were just too much. I think my daughter could tell something was wrong. I found myself at such a loss for words - nothing made any sense; nothing makes sense anymore. I finally had to admit, "Honey, I just don't know - I don't know what's going on in this country anymore..."

Why don't you try reading some newspapers? Oh, oh, riiiight, I see what you mean now. Ach, fine, fuck yez anyway. I'm sure that the Republicans feel the same way when it's a Democrat President getting sucked off under the desk by his intern and then lying about it prosecuting an illegal war in the Balkans and bombing civilian TV stations, rather than simply threatening to in power.
When I finished her lower lip started to tremble and her eyes began to fill with tears, "Daddy" she said, "why are the Republicans doing this to the country?" Well, that was it for me: I finally fell apart. She just fell into my arms and we both began sobbing for several minutes.

I mean, really. I know we Brits are supposed to be undemonstrative, but has this man got no pride? Besides, the last thing that you want to know, as a child, is that daddy feels equally helpless. I think the both of them should be shipped to Guantanamo where they can cry for a year and a day...
For once she had to comfort me and get me back on my feet. Sometimes I just think it's too much, but seeing the strength in my young daughter's voice helped me to get through.

[Emphasis mine, because it is relevent later—DK] Yup, your little girl is stronger than you. In the name of fuck, CheChe, get off your fucking knees. The whole thing is just so saccharine that I feel like vomiting over Mary Poppins...

The thing is, all is not as it seems, as another commenter points out. Because CheChe posted something remarkably similar on April 19th.
But then I think the emotion of the moment started to get the best of her. All the pain that this administration has inflicted upon the world started to sink in and overcome her initial excitement. What began as a few half-hearted snufflings finally turned into outright sobs. Well, that was it for me to. I started crying right along with her. We sat on the sofa together holding each other crying softly comforting eachother as best we can in these dark times.

It's obviously an emotional household, that one. Because, he and his daughter are at it again on April 22nd.
I don't think I've ever seen such a look of misery and dejection on the face of my daughter as I just did a moment ago.

I sat down with her on the sofa and (as calmly as I could) tried to explain to her why the Senate Republicans want to drain the treasury in order to give every American a $100 check. I tried to keep my voice steady, but it became increasingly difficult - the rage and feelings of helplessnes were just too much. I think my daughter could tell something was wrong.

Can you guess what happened then? I bet you can't. No, really, have a guess, seriously. Oh, OK...
I found myself at such a loss for words - nothing made any sense; nothing makes sense anymore. I finally had to admit, "Honey, I just don't know - I don't know what's going on in this country anymore..." [etc. etc.]
...

For once she had to comfort me and get me back on my feet. Sometimes I just think it's too much, but seeing the strength in my young daughter's voice helped me to get through.

Well, that's just so touching. It must be an emotional time for these two, really. Although, only as emotional as on May 11th...
I don't think I've ever seen such a look of misery and dejection on the face of my daughter as I just did a moment ago. She just couldn't understand why the President would be spying on everyone. "Even my Grandma?" she asked pitifully.

Yes, even Grandma, darling; and if she's anything like that disgusting traitor Melita Norwood, it's off to the Gitmo gulag for her.
I sat down with her on the sofa and (as calmly as I could) tried to explain to her why the President has ordered a group of spies to collect information on every American. "And yes honey, even Grandma", I was forced to say.

Right, now can you have a guess? Yes, yes, you're getting the hang of this...
I tried to keep my voice steady, but it became increasingly difficult - the rage and feelings of helplessnes were just too much. I think my daughter could tell something was wrong. I found myself at such a loss for words - nothing made any sense; nothing makes sense anymore. I finally had to admit, "Honey, I just don't know - I don't know what's going on in this country anymore..." [etc. etc.]
...

For once she had to comfort me and get me back on my feet. Sometimes I just think it's too much, but seeing the strength in my young daughter's voice helped me to get through.

Now, given the similarity of these ludicrous postings, one can reach a few conclusions.
  1. CheChe is being genuine, but he has a severe short-term memory failure and only a few stock phrases,

  2. CheChe is a fucking loon, who is doing serious damage to his daughter (assuming that she ain't just in his head,

  3. CheChe is a troll who is ripping the piss out of the Kotz with a piece of quite, quite brilliant satire.

CheChe maintains that he is being genuine but seriously, I think that the man should have his own comedy show.

Still, over to you guys to decide this important question: CheChe—loon, troll or comedy genius?

12 comments:

Anonymous said...

It has to be a troll. No-one would repeat what they had said verbatim otherwise.

The best bit comes from the Commisar:

CheChe,

You should be able to say what you feel. There is nothing trollish about it.

I share your daughter's concerns and questions.


The more challenging question, surely, is whether he/she in on it too?

:P

Anonymous said...

Jumpin' Jeebus Jiminy Crisco™!!!

This guy needs to start mainlining Prozac or he needs to find a new template for his posts.

Either way, I go with full-goose fuckin' loon.

delftsman3 said...

I concur with BC....he's a LOON acting out his loonieness as a Troll.

Deathknyte said...

I would say he is just a weak willed man grasping at straws and teaching his daughter to blindly hate republicans.

The man is obviously emotionally weak.. and the weak shall perish.

Anonymous said...

Total Comedic genius.

This guy had me laughing my ass off.

A similar style site is

www.blamebush.typepad.com

sig94 said...

This is a loon who was left in the spin cycle too long. They'll never get the wrinkles out of this one.

Anonymous said...

The brat seems to be talking like a five year old, if we are to take it CheChe's quoting her verbatim.

So to my mind there are three alternatives explainations:

1) CheChe is telling porkies and making up words to put in his daughters mouth. I accept that small children can sometimes offer gems of startly wisdom, they rarely do so for an entire conversation and since when did flaming five year olds demonstrate this level of political awareness (wrongheaded as it may be).

2) CheChe is so obsessed with BDR that his obsession has corrupted his child and stunted her social and emotional development. 4Fuxsaix a five year old is supposed to be out playing with her freinds not discussing the domestic and foreign policy of the Bush Administration with her manic dad.

3) This is a bit of a follow on from 2). CheChe's daughter is actually 18. She can understand doctoral theses on PoliSci (providing they are reliably left of centre), but her father's obsession has led to unbalanced intellectual development, leaving her with the speech patterns of a five year old.

My vote is for 1) because even the most deranged of fathers wouldn't do 2) or 3) to their own child. Would they?.

RM

ps I understand "loon" but what is the precise meaning of "troll"? In Interweb terms, not Tolkien

Tim Newman said...

It must be satire, surely. When I first read it, I could not believe anyone would write such dross in seriousness.

My money is on him being a brilliant troll.

Anonymous said...

Satire, definitely.

Except....wouldn't the intelligent, sane readers of the weblog be onto it by now, given how many times he's posted the same damn thing?

Oh, "Daily Kos"...right.....that answers that question!

Anonymous said...

Troll = http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Internet_troll

aaron said...

Comic genius.

Anonymous said...

He's from your side.

These inane babblings are deleted as soon as we see them.

Too bad the biggest "loons" the Right can dig up are Republicans pretending to be a parody of Liberals.

Says more about the Right than it does us. You all just keep pretending and we'll see what happens in November.

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