Friday, April 14, 2006

The Euston Manifesto manifests itself

What the fuck is this shit? Bloody hell, between this and Liberty Central, soon we won't be able to move for Lefty Liberals telling us all what they think that we should think and do, an irony that I find quite delicious.

Seriously though, what exactly is the point of this exercise? Yes, I know that not all Lefties are Communist apologists, and I know that not all of them were against the Iraq War (I read Harry's Place when I can be bothered). Via Harry's, in fact, I find that Paul Anderson has summed the whole thing up quite neatly.
  1. Islamists are tossers.

  2. Stalinists are tossers.

  3. Most Trots are tossers.

  4. So are most Labour leftists.

  5. And most anarchists.

  6. And every variety of post-modernist.

  7. Sign up if you're a leftie who agrees with these points.

That does pretty much sum it up; the whole thing is pretty prolix and basically it's... well... I'm still totally in the dark as to what precisely the point of the whole thing is. Apparently they've got some of the MSM interested; well, fine, but what now? Are they going to arrange a delegation to Downing Street or what? If it's just a statement of belief, well, fine; but why all the hoo-ha? I mean, most of us political bloggers essentially make a statement of belief every day.

I think that Tim Newman has the best comment on it that I've read so far; basically he points out that it's all very nice that some of the Left thing that Communism wasn't entirely a good thing, and nor was 9/11, but those of us on the Right knew that anyway. It's because we've got brains and the power of logical and dispassionate thought.

Further, like Tim, I'm with the Worstall on this one, i.e. just leave us alone to trade and get richer would you?
The arrogance with which all of those virtues are claimed for "the left". The pure bloody pomposity of it, that a disagreement about how to achieve them is taken as a sign that the goals themselves are not desired.

That bugs me intensely. That plus the regrettable absence of any mention of Motherhood and Apple Pie. Can’t call it a political manifesto without those.

Update: One signatory emails me with the missing clause:

14 We renounce Tim Worstall, the Worstallites and Worstallism.

The thing is with those of us on the right, what I like to call the real conservatives, is that we don't feel the need to lay out manifestos: in fact, that would probably be the first point in our manifesto:
  1. We will not make any damn manifestos.

  2. Ceci n'est pas un manifesto, pour le sake de fuck.

We kind of just believe in letting people get the fuck on with their lives with as little interference from those "in power" as is humanly possible. We believe that people will do the best thing for themselves and that this, in turn, will lead to a better society for all.

Since a manifesto is simply a document laying out how one group of people intends to interfere in the lives of another group of people then obviously it is, in itself, the antithesis of what we on the Right believe in. However, a short manifesto and little government could actually be a good thing and, in the spirit of this principle, I have composed my own (very short) manifesto for it achieves both aims quite nicely.
  1. Hang the entire NuLabour administration from the nearest row of lamp-posts.

  2. Beat their twitching bodies like pinantas, until Charles Clarke bursts.

  3. Apart from sometime Minister for Children, Margaret Hodge, who gets delivered unto all those people whose ritual and sustained abuse at the hands of paedophiles in the care homes, for which she was responsible, she ignored and then denied all knowledge of. May she fucking rot.

  4. Appoint me as benign dictator for life.

There, that was fairly painless, eh (well, apart from for the NuLabour lot, but then they're cunts and deserve everything that they get).

Far better than the prolix waffling of the Left...

3 comments:

Rory Maxwell said...

Apparently, you're not allowed to criticise this document. It's the other rule... try and enter into a discussion about the thing and some anonymous twat calls you a "snivelling little cunt". Charming.

Blognor Regis said...

1) We will not make any damn manifestos.

Where do I sign?

neil craig said...

Granted I am at the wrong end of the country to appreciate how all railways lead to Euston but in what way is the EUSTON MANIFESTO!! something other than a dozen guys, with no political clout, in a pub?

Get a grip.

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