Thursday, February 02, 2006

CBeebies

Wyndham has been watching CBeebies, and he is very, very sorry.
The format of these shows is exactly the same - huge multi-coloured imbeciles act like children and cavort on a vulgar rainbow-coloured set, singing songs that would have Rod, Jane And Freddy spinning in their grave. Somebody reads a book, which is illustrated by some cheap animation, somebody learns an important lesson about sharing, everybody sings about friendship, credits roll: repeat every day, over and over, until you are dead.

It's all very funny; go and read the lot of it!
And there's Balamory. Balamory features a lively, colour-coded cast of "grown-ups" on a remote Scottish island. Every time I see it I wish local Laird, Archie The Inventor, played by quite possibly the worst actor in the history of television, would come to his senses and invent a gigantic Wicker Man - as is the custom in those parts, I gather - and burn to a crisp the entire freakish lot of them: Miss Hooley, Edie McCready, Pocket And Sweet, Josie Jump and, of course, PC Plum.

I must remember to tell Miles that his acting really isn't appreciated*...


* I suspect that he already knows...

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