UKIP's Nigel Farage said Mr Blair was "outplayed and outclassed" by France's Jacques Chirac in budget negotiations.
But Mr Blair said the deal between the EU's 25 member states had been the best possible "in the circumstances".
Mr Blair said, helpfully speaking in easily-written chunks, as usual: "Well, you see, Nigel; the circumstances were... that Monsieur Chirac was not going... to budge an inch, and I was... utimately... prepared to sell my daughter... into sexual slavery... in rural Pakistan. The other heads of state didn't ask for that... All that they wanted was... another £7 billion of the British... taxpayer's money. So, you see, it really was... the best possbile deal... in the circumstances."
In heated exchanges, he said that although Mr Farage and colleagues "sit with our country's flag, you do not represent our country's interest".
Wait a second... In repeated polls, the British have been largely anti-EU, so it is probably fair to say that Mr Farage actually represents the people of our country rather more than Blair does. And, as it happens, I do think that it is in our interest to withdraw from Europe and I have my reasons: approximately 42 billion of them over the next 8 years.
European Commission chief Jose Manual Barroso has suggested setting an EU tax for citizens of member states.
What a marvellous idea! Instead of paying our direct taxes to support British layabouts, we could pay to support Polish layabouts instead. Hooray!