Prosecute these fraudulent scum

Guido has been doing sterling work in his PorkBusters series, in which he documents the continual and shameless fraud perpetrated by our political class. Today Guido provides a summary of the offences of two pairs of the most egregious offenders who show that—in terms of lies, deceit, and bare-faced fucking chutzpah—the Tories are just as bad as NuLabour.

The mortgage on the Winterton's Belgravia flat purchased in the mid-nineties was paid by the taxpayers for a decade. However the generosity of the taxpayers wasn't enough for them...

By 2002 they were the owners of a now mortgage free property in very good repair (we paid for the repairs) worth some £700,000, yet the Wintertons had a problem. There was no longer a mortgage to justify a housing allowance, meaning that tens of thousands of pounds that they had been claiming annually would no longer be claimable.

The Wintertons transferred the property to a trust to avoid £280,000 inheritance tax - a not unusual arrangement - however their arrangement had a twist. They themselves are the trustees, their children are the beneficiaries. The trustees (the Wintertons) charged the tenants (the Wintertons) £21,600 a year rent, which was paid by the taxpayer (you).

That arrangement over five years would, by Guido's estimation, net them the trust £108,000 tax free, equivalent before tax to £180,000 to an ordinary taxpayer. The Standards and Privileges Committee has ruled that those payments are against the rules.

So will the estimated £108,000 paid to their own trust be repaid to the taxpayer? If not, why not?

Because it's only taxpayers' money, eh? It just falls from the fucking sky, doesn't it? It's not as though it represents the blood, sweat and toil of hundreds of people, is it?

Oh, no, wait a second: yes, it fucking well does.

Fuck it: this is fraud. Prosecute these stinking fucking cunts: prosecute them for fraud and then imprison them, confiscate the property and pay the money back to the public purse. Why the fuck should these fucking whores be able to enrich themselves illegally at our expense?

And on to the next bunch of fraudsters.

Ed and Yvette Balls are Labour's equivalent to the Wintertons. Mr and Mrs Balls are paid by the taxpayers quarter-of-a-million a year between them to ride around in ministerial limos, yet so hard done by are they that they still need to claim tens of thousands extra in mortgage subsidy on top. The cabinet pair have registered their North London house as a 'second home' under parliamentary rules, entitling them to allowances of up to £43,200 a year to subsidise their £438,000 mortgage.

The home in Yorkshire nearer to their constituencies was previously called their second home. But by simply declaring their more expensive London house to be their secondary residence, they can claim more money from taxpayers. The rules state that their primary residence, against which they cannot claim, is the home in which they are ordinarily resident. They spend most of their time in London at their "second home" and their kids go to schools locally. When Andrew Neil recently challenged Ed Balls about this live on television, Ed said "it is complicated". No it isn't, it is a fiddle to extract more pork out of the taxpayer. They are defrauding the taxpayers by lying as to where their primary residence is actually located. Shamelessly.

They have in the past done the now commonplace ruse of re-mortgaging a home that has had the mortgage paid down by the taxpayers subsidy to realise profits as well. By lying that their main home is actually their second home they are now entitled to hit up the taxpayer for any appliances they can buy in John Lewis, household repairs, kitchen re-fits and even groceries.

Again, this is outright fraud: prosecute these cunts. Bugger Lord Levy, how about bringing a private prosecution against these couple of pairs of cunts? Are there any barristers out there who would do this pro bono (and it is)?

These bastards are stealing our money (twice over) and then metaphorically slapping our faces with their cocks: and the reason that these bastards keep on doing this is because we keep on letting the cunts get away with it. Bring a private prosecution, imprison and impoverish a few of them and they might just get the message that we object to them stealing our fucking cash.

Finally, Guido highlights the difference between how the authorities treat our Lords and Masters, and how they treat their serfs.

Compare the treatment of the troughing Wintertons to the treatment of an unfortunate researcher working for an MP (Guido knows her identity). She was over-paid an extra month after she terminated her employment with an MP. She thought it was her termination bonus. Some months later she was contacted by the very same Fees Office asking for re-payment. She explained she thought it was her bonus, and that she had spent it and could only afford to repay it in installments. The Fees Office refused to accept her offer and are currently taking her to Court for a mistake not of her making. A very different kind of justice for her...

These people are just fucking scum. As I said to Keith Hill MP, in a different context,

Really, I expected nothing more from you: you are, after all, a politician and, as such, a pretty poor specimen of humanity.

When I said "pretty poor", of course, I mean that these people are the lowest of the fucking low and should be kicked through the streets of Westminster, the bunch of evil, little bastards.

They should then be gathered into a great big stone cellar and the doors firmly locked. Imagine the sweat and confusion! And imagine the fear as, through holes in the ceiling, forty three nests full of buzzing, angry Asian giant hornets are dropped into the room.

The screams and pleading would last for hours and I, for one, would watch stoney-faced as, one by one, these arseholes succumb to the repeated and excruciating stings of the furious insects...

UPDATE: I was having an argument with The Dude a couple of weeks ago, and the gist of it went like this...

Jackart: I'm not that worried about the expenses thing. After all, everyone fiddles their expenses.

DK: I don't.

Jackart: Yeah, but everyone does it so we should expect our MPs to do it too, and everyone does it.

DK: No. They. Don't. I have never fiddled my expenses, or my overtime. Ever. Call it a fear of being caught if you like, but I prefer to call it honesty because that's what actually motivates me: if I fiddle my expenses then I am damaging the company and, untimately then, myself.

Besides, fiddling your expenses is theft: I thought that we libertarians were against theft?

Further, just because "everybody does it" doesn't make it right. If everyone had murdered someone, would that make it right? If everyone had raped someone, would that make it right?

The final—and least substantive—point is that I am not trying to tell other people how they should live their lives; I am not legislating to control the behaviour of other people whilst deliberately breaking the law myself. With malice aforethought.

Fuck them: fuck them right in the ear and then cum in their eyes. Fuck them all.

I just thought that I'd pass that on...