Wednesday, May 14, 2008

Cunt of the Week: Sir Robert Atkins

Sir Robert Atkins says, "you proles are all stupid bastards."

From the second News Of The World MEPs' expenses story, here's the wise words of Tory MEP, Sir Robert Atkins. [Emphasis mine.]
Tory toff North West MEP Sir Robert Atkins has admitted paying his pensioner wife Lady Dulcie Mary Atkins over £30,000 a year as his secretary.

She squeezes this role in alongside her work as a busy member of Wyre Borough Council, and Garstang Town Council, as well as holding down a string of community and charitable commitments.

But Sir Robert is generous with public funds—our records show that back in 2002 HIS SON James was also on the payroll at £2,513.23 a month.
...

Last night when we asked Sir Robert Atkins about the staffing allowance he insisted it was all above board and added: "It's very complicated and I don't suppose any of your readers would understand it."

No, Robert (and Right Honourable you absolutely aren't, you cunt), it is not very complicated at all. Au contraire, sunshine, it is actually extraordinarily simple: you are a devious, perfidious, supercilious, corrupt fucking cunt with all of the charm of watching a big black dog lay a fat, steaming turd in a children's playground and you have been enriching yourself at the expense of the taxpayer in the most egregious and bare-faced manner.

You are a total and utter bastard without an honourable or honest bone in your body; I hope that you fall into an industrial threshing machine. Feet first, you cunt.

Fuck you and all of your colleagues: you are all vomitous masses of venality and treachery. For fuck's sake, I'm the Devil and I think that you are evil: may you burn in hell.

4 comments:

James said...

I seriously doubt it, but he could just be having a pop at the news of the world's readership...

Ade said...

all of the charm of watching a big black dog lay a fat, steaming turd

Brown turd, or white turd?

Whatever happened to white dog turds?

Trixy said...

He's suing the screws, I hear. Not sure what for. Being mean to him?

leg-iron said...

White dog turds are collected in the night by Labour's army of hoodied goblins, and used to whiter-than-whiten the Great Leader's teeth.

Just look how effective it was for Tiny Blur.

There's only one side effect. The recipient ends up talking shit all the time.