Sunday, January 06, 2008

Stupid conversations

Via Vindico, I find that Keatonmask has been having a few problems with British Gas.
BG: 'Hello Sir I am a supervisor, we are calling a you for immediate payment of the £627 you owe on your gas account. Do you have a debit or credit card handy?'

Me: 'Is this regarding [address]?'

BG: 'Yes sir'

Me: 'This property burned down in June of this year, as I have informed you at least half a dozen times. So this is for estimated usage yes?'

BG: 'That is correct sir'.

Me: 'For a property that doesn't exist?'

BG: 'Yes sir'

Me: 'Tell me again why I should be paying this?'

BG: 'I must accept immediate payment in full sir'

Me: 'You must accept that you are a cretin who doesn't seem to understand the idea that one doesn't pay for utilities that have not been used'.

Go and read the whole sorry conversation. As Timmy points out, governments do not have a monopoly on stupidity and inefficiency (although they do tend to occupy the top spot)...


Budgie said...

I once spent 2 hours (I was working on my pc, honest) trying to convince a Vodafone rep that there are 30 days in November, not the 28 that he thought.

wonkotsane said...

I had a letter from British Gas the other day saying that they're putting up our monthly gas direct debit by £17 because they've estimated that we've underpaid by £5 per month for the last quarter. They've estimated because the meter reader can't get into the meter box because the lock has broken. I've told them this a couple of times now and they've failed to arrange for someone to fix it. Then the numpty on the phone told me that it's my responsibility to repair the box to which I politely told him to go forth and multiply, it's not my meter, not my meter box and not my responsibility. He then decided that it was National Grid's responsibility after all and gave me a number to ring. Anyway, I explained that I wasn't happy paying £17 per month more on the basis that we had underpaid by £5 per month, the increase should therefore be no more than £10 but he said he couldn't estimate it down, only up. He said that I should cancel the direct debit if I wanted to pay less ... I pointed out that by doing that I would lose the 10% dual-fuel dis count to which he replied "yes". So I'd end up paying more, cretin. I told him that we'd had cavity wall insulation in the summer and had hardly used the central heating this winter as a result but no, he couldn't estimate the bill down, just up.

I've still got about 6 months of fixed price tariff left but come the summer I think it'll be time for a move. Not least because in England they're British Gas and in Scotland they're Scottish Gas. Are there any English gas suppliers?